Tu Bishvat is right around the corner – this weekend to be exact.  I’m watching the snow fall and the temperature hover around -15C and I can’t say I’m in a very ‘happy birthday trees’ mood.

This week alone I had 3 of my children home with the flu and my husband suspected every tickle in his nose… Last night I got an email from my sons’ school informing us that within 5 days they will be moving downtown creating a 1.5 hour commute (one way) for my sons – 3 hours every day back and forth.  To deal with this I needed to cancel one of the ongoing Mussar groups that meets weekly.  Half my office is heated while the other half has a less efficient system so ultimately right now we can choose to sit in a t-shirt or file papers in our coats and mitts – ok, maybe not that bad but it feels that bad…

Anyone wishing a tree a happy birthday yet?

And then I realized how easy it is to just put off the Jewish stuff.  It’s only trees, right?  I mean, Rosh Hashannah, Yom Kippur, Pesach – that’s major Jewishness, but trees??  How easy to just lose myself in fixing vents, finding schools and chicken souping a cold.  But ultimately, I don’t want to choose being the person who copes and bandaids.

Being Jewish in every moment means I can choose meaning over chores.  Not to say I won’t fix the vents or find the schools but now I am motivated to do that so I get them out of the way because understanding Tu Bishvat, celebrating nature and trees, reminding myself of my place within the whole – that’s way beyond the chicken soup.

So on Tu Bishvat I will indeed stand outside, heavily layered in winter clothing, lean on a tree, close my eyes and think of Torah and Trees of Knowledge and Trees of Life. Genesis clearly tells us that within hours of creation, we headed to a tree and changed the world forever.  We’re forever connected to the trees, it’s probably worth a thought one day a year.

Have a great Tu Bishvat!

A few months ago, I blogged about Miep Gies, the woman who preserved the diary of Anne Frank following the Holocaust.  Miep, who claimed not to be a hero had just been honoured by having a planet named after her in October.  The original article that I referenced can be read here.

I learned last week that Miep Gies had passed away in her 100th year.  She was quoted as saying, “I don’t want to be considered a hero. Imagine young people would grow up with the feeling that you have to be a hero to do your human duty. I am afraid nobody would ever help other people, because who is a hero? I was not. I was just an ordinary housewife and secretary.”

We have lost a true woman of valour.

I have been thoroughly impressed with the global efforts to aid Haiti.  Celebrities, radio and television personalities, various institutions and children have banded together towards one common goal.  On television, billboards, through social networking sites and in subway stations I am seeing exceptions relief efforts.

As a supporter of Israel, I was very proud to learn that Israel’s humanitarian efforts in Haiti are sophisticated and critical.  The following is a glimpse of the Israeli field hospital in Port Au Prince:

Israel in Haiti

What frustrates me is the response from anti-Zionists claiming that the Israeli intention for this work is an attempt to ‘distract the world from their daily ethnic cleansing of Palestinians’ as Stephanie Guttman writes in this article. While some comments to her article imply that this was written as a parody, that Israel can never do anything with the proper intention, there are many points in her writing that portray the Israeli army in a negative light that the average reader may not understand her angle.  In any event, I am proud of the Israeli mission to Haiti and I am hopeful that the positive publicity will outweigh the negative.

You attend a social gathering filled with family.  Across the room you see someone you recognize that you haven’t seen in a while.  You remember that the last time the two of you spoke there was a minor falling out and then you lost touch.

You could:
-       cross the room and greet the person with a smile
-       wait for the person to greet you first and then you will respond warmly
-       pretend you didn’t see the person

What would you do? Share your opinion and leave a comment.

Last month we presented a ‘Mussar Dilemma’, a day to day situation we all have experienced with a Mussar question attached.

While checking out at the supermarket, the person in front of you continuously delays you by running back into the aisles to pick up just a few forgotten items.  Although you have nothing scheduled for afterwards, you are getting annoyed at the ongoing delay.

I offer food for thought from a Mussar perspective:

There are 2 different things to consider at this moment.  The first thing is your reaction outwardly to either the cashier or the person shopping.  The second thing to consider is your growing internal feeling of impatience and annoyance even though you have no pressing deadline.

Option 1: Complain to the cashier while the shopper has run back into the store.
Although it is understandable why someone might opt for this, it would obviously involve speaking of someone behind their back.

Option 2:  Tell the person delaying you that you are in a hurry, even though you are not.
This option might well bring about an apology and a change of behaviour (best case) but it is clearly based on an untruth.

Option 3: Tell the person delaying you that you would appreciate if they would finish all their shopping before going to the cashier.
This person will likely feel awkward and embarrassed.  Since Judaism takes this very seriously, you’d need a strong purpose for publicly chastising someone.  Since the purpose is to vent your frustration, Mussar would question choosing to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel badly.

Option 4: Subtly change to another cashier.
By choosing a different cashier you are effectively changing your environment.  Environments and events speak to us as powerfully as do people and sometimes a subtle change in environment is just the choice that fits the moment.

Mandatory Option 5:  Address your frustration
Mussar would now strongly recommend that you explore the frustration and irritation you experienced.  With no deadline at stake, why were you so annoyed by the delay?

My desk at work and the workspace around me has gotten out of control.  My colleagues and I have clearly become complacent about the environment in which we work.  The piles of paper, the empty boxes and the office supplies strewn about became commonplace.  While I like to pride myself on being an organized person, I had regressed.  This afternoon, with some inspiration and motivation, we worked together to tidy and reorganize our office by shifting furniture, throwing things out and storing items not immediately needed. Within moments, our space was less cluttered and had a fresh, new look.

Mussar teaches us that our environment is like having someone else at the table.  In other words, I would never invite guests into my home if it were a mess. I would want it to be a reflection of who I am.  Maybe my space morphed into a mess because I don’t ever conduct meetings at my desk, but that should not have been an excuse. The environment didn’t create itself, I created it.  If I internalize what Mussar teaches us, then I will always be cognizant of my environment. Now it’s just maintaining that attitude.

You attend a social gathering filled with family.  Across the room you see someone you recognize that you haven’t seen in a while.  You remember that the last time the two of you spoke there was a minor falling out and then you lost touch.

You could:
-       cross the room and greet the person with a smile
-       wait for the person to greet you first and then you will respond warmly
-       pretend you didn’t see the person

What would you do? Leave a comment below and check back next month for the Mussar answer.

I made my way to the gym tonight for a 6:30 spin class.  Due to the popularity of this instructor, it is necessary to arrive at least 30 minutes before the class starts to get a bike.  Following the rush hour commute, the parking procedure and the slow elevator (that I curse every time I work out), I arrived close to 6:00 and rushed to get organized and up to the change room. I was relieved to get a bike and for next 90 minutes I focused on my workout. The instructor tells me that it’s all about setting an intent for the class.

Following a good sweat and a few moments in the sauna I made my way down to my car. I was shocked to find my trunk unlocked and open. I had been in automatic and popped my trunk as I do daily when I get home. Not such a big deal if my snow scraper and rollerblades were the only items in there, but my computer, a few files and my wallet were all accessible.  I held my breath, opened the truck and I was SO relieved to discover that everything was there.  (I think I may have even thanked God)

I took this moment to contemplate what could have happened.  Had my personal belongings been stolen, I likely would have blamed the dishonest thieves who attend that gym and I would have been on the defensive everytime I went back even though it was my wrongdoing.  While the outcome of the situation could have been much different, I speculated losing control of the situation and my behaviours. It certainly was a Mussar moment.  For more on Mussar (Jewish Ethics), check out the All About Me section of RachaelsCentre.org.

All About Me

I seem to be suffering from Blogger’s block.  When I consulted the Internet on this topic, I was instructed:

1) Not to panic

2) Be honest

3) Blog about something I have never blogged about

So, here it goes. It’s a cold and gloomy Monday afternoon and I’m sitting down to blog.  I’m quite calm about blogging because it comes pretty naturally to me but to be honest, I really don’t have much on my mind. Perhaps that’s because I was on vacation for 2 weeks and I’m just getting back into the grind that is my life.  I have never blogged about blogger’s block before so I think I have just created a blog post and I followed all 3 of the recommended criteria.  Thank you Internet!