It’s been a very interesting month at Rachael’s Centre with both highs and some lows.  We are in the process of moving our website, RachaelsCentre.org, between companies.  A wide world of web technology that I use everyday but never bothered to wonder about that fearful question: how does this stuff really work?  Like most technology in my life (I must admit, including the can opener and my clock), I easily benefit from them daily but never bother to learn what makes them do what they do.  The high points of all of this have been learning an enormous amount about cyberspace, internet, global communicating and how it works.  The low parts have been, as usual, I learn about it when something goes wrong.

We haven’t had access to add many videos to our website so I had a crash course in how we’ve been adding videos all along.  We haven’t been able to edit and make corrections to things and…again…crash course.

I believe we are at the end of the ‘moving’ journey and everything should return to normal very soon but I’d like to apologize to those visitors on our website for not having our usual growth of materials these last few weeks.  Probably the greatest moment of learning for me was concluding that moving your ‘home’ on the internet is just as stressful and just as loaded with unexpected dilemmas as moving your home in the real world.

Thank you to everyone for your patience and to everyone on my Team at Rachael’s Centre, thanks for adding what was needed to complete our cyber-move.

Word to the wise – the cyber couch is just as heavy as the real one is…

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Continuing with our shopping environment, one of the students in our Mussar group raised the example we have all faced.
You are standing in line at a busy cashier.  Suddenly a second cashier opens the cash in the next lane.  The person in front of you was next to be served but the new cashier announces ‘I’m open over here’ and suddenly a new line forms from those who were waiting behind you.
Clearly the person in front of you should have been served next and has been ignored.
You could:
(a)    Loudly tell the new cashier that the person in front of you should be served before the others in line.
(b)    Say nothing and do nothing
(c)    Wait until after you check out and then complain privately to the manager about the cashier
(d)    Quietly speak to the person in front of you in line and let them know you are aware they should have been served next.

What would you do? Post a comment and join the conversation.

Last month we presented a ‘Mussar Dilemma’, a day to day situation we all have experienced with a Mussar question attached.

You attend a social gathering filled with family.  Across the room you see someone you recognize that you haven’t seen in a while.  You remember that the last time the two of you spoke there was a minor falling out and then you lost touch.

Here are the options for your response and what Mussar has to say:

(a) look away and pretend you didn’t see the person.

Clearly we know that this option would not be the optimum choice.  It creates a falsehood and an action to reinforce the lie.  As much as we know this would be the least appropriate response, it’s interesting how many of us opt for this response as the easy way to avoid the entire dilemma.

When it comes to Mussar, the easy way is quite often not the most appropriate.

(b) wait for the person to greet you first and then you’ll respond warmly.

Although this option seems like it would address the situation properly, it is transferring the choice to someone else.  Mussar teaches us to choose our own responses, if we hand over the gift of our choice to someone else then we are no longer pushing beyond our limitations.

(c)  cross the room and greet the person with a smile.

This option is the most appropriate for the situation.  The person in the room is someone you recognize and with whom you have a connection.  The awkwardness of the moment should not be the defining point.  It is important to remember that everyone should be treated with respect regardless of a previous conflict.

Mussar would encourage you to try and respond with option (c).  The next step would be to ask ourselves why it felt so difficult to cross the room and initiate respectful greetings.

One of our blog visitors responded with:

Do you agree or disagree? Join in on this conversation and add your comment below.

Once when teaching a grade 2 class, I felt it was important that they begin to understand how hurtful ‘lashon harah’, speaking negatively about others, could be.  I gathered the children together on our carpet since I felt they should realize how personal this is and I wanted them to engage and invest themselves in this very important Jewish value.

I was so taken with how their eyes were glued on me and the silence in the room told me how seriously they were absorbing what I was teaching.  It was one of those moments when we see the connection building between us and the generation to come.  It was a very moving moment for me.

After class one little girl came up to me and said she really understood what I was trying to say and that we should never talk about others behind their backs.  To show me how much she had absorbed this valuable lesson she then said: ‘I never do that to anyone, but Lisa, she always does that.’

There’s an interesting subtlety that Judaism brings to environmentalism.  Generally we are concerned with recycling materials so they are not wasted and can be reformed into other useful items.  Judaism goes one step beyond by asking what was the purpose of the item in its original form and what is the purpose of its recycled new form.

Items that were originally used for spiritual purposes or fulfilling of commandments should continue to be reshaped into items that will likewise facilitate spirituality and commandments.  If we believe that by engaging in a holy act we are essentially effecting things then we likewise believe that we have effected them forever.  Holiness should not be undone.

For example, after a lulav has been used for Sukkot and blessings were made on it that it is no longer an ordinary tree branch and should never be treated as such.  There is a tradition to save the lulav until Pesach when it can be used for the fire that will burn our chametz.  Another example would be when the fringes on the talit are worn thin and no longer useful as a talit, it is traditional to use weave the fringes together and create a bookmark for studying Torah, or other Jewish texts.

In other words, recycling is not just about reforming something but about recognizing how it was used to begin with and maintaining the integrity of the materials and our relationships with them.

Try and think of other Jewish recycling suggestions and send them to me, or post a comment below – these ideas can easily move into our homes, to our children, our grandchildren who can enrich their commitment to the environment through their Jewish knowledge.

Rachael responds to the recent story of a woman who was arrested for praying at the Western Wall because she was wearing a tallit. Rachael asks how we can speculate what a person’s intent is and what their rights are as a member of the Jewish community.

My weekends are often spent catching up on sleep, running errands and socializing with friends. This weekend, I decided to change it up a bit.

Shabbat Shalom

Following a wonderful Shabbat pot luck dinner with friends, I woke up early and headed up north to cottage country.  I was thrilled to be among great friends, the peace of the wilderness and it was an added bonus that we celebrated Tu Bishvat together. On Shabbat we ate 15 species of fruit and grains that had different levels of edibility (edible skin, edible pit, inedible skin, inedible pit) which acts as a metaphor for different personality types and we blessed  four cups of wine representative of the seasons.      I was inaccessible via phone, there was no Facebook activity and we were treated with 20+ centimetres of snow.  While I often complain that I have chosen to settle in such a climate, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to wear snowpants, sled down the driveway and catch snowflakes on my tongue. It helped that I was among young children and toddlers.

Showered with snow

Seasons are important. They force us into different clothing, they encourage us to participate in exciting activities and they help instill an appreciation for our surroundings and our religious observances and celebrations.