You are attending your family Seders at a relative’s house. You look forward to it and have some insights you’d like to share about Jewish values and challenges. There are other people at the table who are not as engaged in the ‘Jewishness’ of the evening and would like to race through the Hagadah to get to the food. Every time you raise a topic for discussion, they groan or roll their eyes.

You could:
(a) Ask them why they’re being so rude to you.
(b) Tell them you appreciate that they’re hungry but you’d love a few minutes of discussion knowing this could spark an argument.
(c) Promise yourself that next year you will decline the invitation to join this Seder again.
(d) Do nothing and say nothing.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Send an e-mail to info@rachaelscentre.org.

What to do with all that Chametz

The history of selling our chametz before Pesach is layered with Jewish creativity, Jewish history, Halachic innovation and the financial challenges of completely emptying our pantries to refill them with Pesach goods, only to then have to refill them again the following week.

There is no question that when this ‘cleansing’ of the cupboards and double-filling becomes a financial hardship, one should consider selling the chametz and reclaiming it afterwards. But fortunately, many of us are not facing financial hardship with our food – we sell it because it is convenient.

In that case, Jewish environmentalism would speak loudly inviting us to use the mitzvah of ‘burning the chametz’ as an opportunity to fulfill other mitzvot.

Unopened food packages should be taken to city food banks and donated. In that way, the food is not wasted and the mitzvah of supporting and sustaining those less fortunate is engaged. It is sad that in our day we cannot donate opened food goods because of health and safety concerns (sad but completely understandable). In that case, we must always remember that our responsibility toward those less fortunate includes all creatures and not just other people.

Opened food packages can be cooked and then left outside for animals. It is springtime and many of the returning and awakening animals are hungry. Cookies, breads, baked goods can be taken to ponds and fed to birds directly. Invite family and friends to join you and now the Jewish value of community building is part of the day. On the other hand, perhaps you prefer a moment of solitude while you do this before the family gathers for Pesach celebrations.

Getting rid of our chametz is not just a stripping away of something but speaks directly to the Jewish environmental commitments to nurture and nourish our fellow creatures. Through the craziness of Pesach prep, it’s lovely to take a few moments of peace and solitude outside with the smells and colours of spring and the sharing of our food.

Each mitzvah should bring opportunity for another mitzvah!

A mother was looking forward to coming into town for Pesach with her husband and their 3 little children. She had spent weeks preparing her children for the special Seder they were going to attend with the whole family and the wonderful food they were going to eat and all the songs they were going to sing.

Since she herself had not been in town for years, she forgot that most of the family was now somewhat elderly and she was the only one at the Seder with small children. She told me she completely underestimated how long the Seder would take.

The evening started well enough with lots of smiles. Once everyone sat down, the mother sat with the adults while her children were seated at ‘the kid’s table’. As time went by, the mother was keenly aware of all the noise coming from the kid’s table and she was trying to quietly shush her children and encourage patience.

It was clear the kids were not going to be able to sit quietly for much longer. The mother went over to them and (she admits, regrettably, being somewhat frazzled) she scolded her children and told them she doesn’t want to hear another sound from them. This is Pesach, she reminded them, and children are only supposed to ask questions at the Seder, not make noise.

The children were feeling bad and sat quietly with their heads down. This lasted for about 5 minutes when one child raised her head and asked a question directed at the adults: “Are we out yet?” When the mother asked what she meant, the daughter replied: “From Egypt, are we out yet?” The mother answered that they hadn’t reached that part yet.

For the next 15 minutes the children asked the adults every few minutes: “Are we out yet?”

One of the elderly relatives turned to the kids and said “if you ask me that one more time, I’m turning this caravan around and heading right back to Egypt!”

The children were silent, the elderly man turned back to the table and broke into a huge smile.